Just before the project's production trip to New York City last August, Nicole was interviewed and shared her feelings about the challenges that Craig was going through.

Yet, at the time, there was hope.

Nicole said that Craig had a girlfriend and was doing what he loved, working as a music engineer. She also mentioned that he had a room for rent in the apartment that he and his girlfriend shared.

Because my friend Doug was looking for a place to live, Nicole and I agreed that it might be a good idea to call Craig and see if he'd like to be a part of this documentary. I would film Doug going over to his place to meet Craig and check out the room for rent. I was hoping that they might have a beer and even start a friendship.

Craig was friendly but hesitant during our first phone conversation. "Let me think about it" he said. I called him again when I arrived in New York and again he asked for a few days more to talk it over with his girlfriend. I could see that he was struggling with the decision.

Two days before we were scheduled to leave, as I was sitting outside the Bryant Park Grill getting ready to shoot an interview, my cell phone rang. It was Craig.

"I'm sorry man, but I'm going to have to pass on this," he said.

I asked him why.

"I don't really know how I can contribute to your film. I don't have much to say about bipolar you know, and I'm not even sure that I want people to know that about me. Why do you want me to be involved?" he asked.

"Well, obviously I don't you know you at all. All I know is what I've heard from your sister. But from my point of view, it looks to me like you are a positive example of someone who is living with the illness - you recognize it - and can still manage to work and have a relationship. You take the meds and don't play games with them and you're living a productive, independent life. I have a lot of friends who can't find work that they enjoy. You are working in the field that you want to be working in. You are able to have a relationship with someone. These are all things that my friend Doug is struggling with. So even though it may not seem like it to you, I think you represent something very positive and I'd like to include you in this story."

It was quiet for a moment. Then Craig laughed and said "Alright man, you talked me into it. You know, if the doc filmmaking thing doesn't work out you should be a salesman."

I laughed and told him that it's easy to "sell" what you believe in. I was impressed by Craig's decision. It was obviously a deeply personal and courageous move that was inspired by his opportunity to be of service - to help others - even though he didn't think he could. To me, it was heroic for Craig to go out on a limb like that.

when we were babies mom saw the same smile same shining dark eyes, smooth dark hair i am your little sister and loved to have you near the brother sister bond will always live on you are forever a superstar, my beautiful big brother like no other before, you opened my soul i am forever changed and will love you forever now you are free may your spirit dance happiness eternally - from Nicole's poem "Superstar"

The next day - our last day of production, my crew and I were in a cab on our way to meet Craig for his interview, when the East Coast blackout hit and the entire city was paralyzed. We missed the interview as signals stopped working, gridlock hit and our cab driver dumped us out at the Brooklyn Bridge.

All I could do was contact Craig a week later to thank him for his willingness to participate. I promised him that we'd catch him down the road on our follow-up trip later in the year. He said that would be fine. And I knew he meant it.

The last time I spoke to Craig was after his back surgery. I knew he was struggling with tremendous pain, both physical and emotional, and I called to wish him the best with his recovery.

Things then turned from bad to worse. Craig lost his job and his relationship ended. He moved back to the family home in Boston and on March 15, 2004, Craig took his own life.

Since beginning this project, I have come to understand bipolar disorder and I am not surprised anymore by the devastating effect that it can have on people who suffer from it. For many, the pain is just too much to live with.

I regret not having had a chance to meet Craig and hang out with him. He seemed like a great guy who struggled as far as he could go with it. I know he will live on in the hearts and minds of many.

This film will be dedicated to the memory of Craig.

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